I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
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how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
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I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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