oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
this beer tastes like vomit already
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize