What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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