Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize