What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
