I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
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He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
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I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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