What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Randomize
