she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
