Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
