Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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