we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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