ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
