How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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