i don't like sucking hair
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
