quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
