What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
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