before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
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2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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