Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize