i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
