All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Randomize