Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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