Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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