At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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