No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
