Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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