They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
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