My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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