So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
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No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
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Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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