also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
