Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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