Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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