More tranny stories later!
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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