I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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