i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
