omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
