We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
