im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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