ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
