the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
