I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize