im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I'm jealous of your bromance
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
