After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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