just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
