Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
