When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
