Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
