I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize