she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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