we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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