I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
