How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
